Just Taking a Break

A friend sent me this through the e-mail. Just so I can keep it for future use, I blog it. Gone is my folder of such inanities. This weblog serves as my new filing cabinet. Please don't take the following seriously. With my apologies to the English language. By the way, most Filipinos don't really talk like this -- well, admittedly, we talk like Filipinos when we speak English. Can't apologize for that.

"IF YOU ARE FILIPINO, YOU WILL GET THESE...

1. Use ADIEU in a sentence.
If you are ADIEU, the Arabs will kill you. (If you are a jew, the Arabs will kill you.)

2. Use SCHOOLING in a sentence.
(Phone rings).....Hello? Who SCHOOLING? (Hello, who's calling?)

3. Use AFFECT in a sentence.
Maria is wearing AFFECT diamond ring. (Maria is wearing a fake diamond ring)

4. Use PAUL four times in a sentence.
PAUL, be care PAUL, you might PAUL in the swimming PAUL. (Paul, be careful, you might fall in the swimming pool)

5. Use DELETION in a sentence.
The balat of DELETION is crispy. (The balat of the lechon is crispy)

6. Use PAMPERS and PAPERS in a sentence.
At the gas station, some people PAMPERS and some PAPERS. (At the gas station, some people pump first, and some pay first.)

7. Use TENACIOUS in a sentence.
I went to the shoe store to buy a pair of TENACIOUS. (I went to the shoe store to buy a pair of -can't understand this one - ten shoes?)

8. Use IRAQ , EGYPT , and IRAN in a sentence.
I threw IRAQ at EGYPT and then IRAN . (I threw a rock at a jeep and then I ran.)

10. Use DEFLATE in a sentence.
Can you please wash DEFLATE for me? (Can you please wash the plate for me?)

11. Use PERSUADING in a sentence.
Jack and Jill got married on Nov. 1, 1997. So on Nov.1, 1998, they are going to celebrate their PERSUADING anniversary. (Jack and Jill got married on November 1 1997. So on November 1, 1998, they are going to celebrate their first wedding anniversary.)

12. Use DEDUCT, DEFENSE, DEFEAT, and DETAIL in a sentence.
DEDUCT jumped over DEFENSE; first DEFEAT, and then DETAIL. (The duck jumped over the fence, first, the feet, and then the tail.)

13. Use DEVASTATION in a sentence.
Every morning I wait for the bus at DEVASTATION. (Every morning I wait for the bus at the bus station.)

14. Use FACT 3x in a sentence. As a matter of FACT, the birds cannot fly without FACT FACT! As a matter of fact, the birds cannot fly without pakpak (wings)"